fear the birds

So I am in Jakarta, I have been here for a few days now. It’s still as hectic and as disorienting as I remembered it from my last visit almost eight months ago. It’s only been days, but it feels like forever.

I hate to say this, but there’s something about Jakarta that just pisses me off. I’m not comfortable here. Well, duh, I mean I’ve been living abroad almost my entire life now. I lived in places that are pretty accessible, and where you don’t have to depend so much on people to get around and/ or get things done. It’s terrible. I have two maids in the house, and both of them are younger than me. I’m 21 years old. Yeah. It feels awkward to have them do chores and get things done for me. I also have a driver who drives me around whenever I need to go out and do things.

Yeah.

Not like I do much outside of the house while I’m here anyway. I dislike the mall/cafe crawl thing that people do here, and just to lazy to try do anything else.

Indonesia is a weird place. It’s like looking at a middle aged woman who had a lot going for her in the past, and maybe in the future but she doesn’t know what to do with it. She used to be pretty but she fucked all the boys in the football team. She used to be talented, but she sucked one too many cocks in the past. And now she waits tables to feed her meth addicted kids. Once in awhile she’ll pick up a trucker or two and a have a nice hot, steam romp in a motel far from home.

Well, on the bright side being here forces me to be away from World of Warcraft. A much needed break.

It’s funny, the idea of me having a blog. Most of the time I don’t really know what I want to write here, I’m always unsure about how much I should share with the interweb and all.

Oh right, title of the freaking entry. About me being a piker. For those who don’t know what it means: I ditch people when we’re supposed to go out / meet / whatever. Yeah. I ditch. Sometimes I tell them. Sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I’ll make an excuse. Sometimes I won’t.

This characteristic of mine is one of the things that may be a problem when I’m making new friends. I don’t know. My close friends understand, and they know I do this and it’s ok. While new people that I just got acquainted with might just think I’m an asshole and I don’t want to hang out with them. Well, it’s true. I’m kind of an asshole. It’s a terrible thing but for the most parts, getting to know me or to spend time with me could be quite an effort. I would just like to apologize to all the nice people that I’ve gotten to know over the years but haven’t got to know better even though I wanted to. Simply because I pike a lot. That’s just the way I am. I’m hoping to change though. Maybe?

Oh and Tom DiCillo is the latest to addition to my ‘awesome directors’ list. I just saw one of his more recent films, Delirious (with Steve Buscemi and Michael Pitt), and it was nice. His older stuff includes Johnny Suede and Living in Oblivion Both are extremely awesome. I love his protagonists. They always have this nice, melancholic, sentimental, peter-panish qualities to them. And Steve Buscemi. STEVE BUSCEMI!

I still want to see Tarsem’s The Fall. But yeah. That may be awhile still. Oh well.

VISA INTERVIEW TMRW AT EARLY MORNINGZ LOLOMGWTFPN!